Friday, January 17, 2014

Baby Steps, 3, The Null Day

So no baby steps happened yesterday. Instead, I pretty much pulled in the sidewalks and shut the curtains. It was the anniversary of my little brother's death — a long, long time ago, but it still gets me, no matter what I do. I pretty much just felt sad about that and about life in general and super anxious about the still not job thing.

I stayed up very late, trying to avoid going to bed (why? because sleep certainly is a great way to lose yourself), I woke up a few times, then today I chose to go back to sleep and slept until 1:30 pm. I don't really expect any baby steps today. Maybe I'll take a quick turn around the yard for some (really gray) sunlight.

That's all there is to say for now.

4 comments:

  1. I'm sorry you had a rough day. I didn't realize it was the anniversary, or I would have made an effort to get in touch, despite the painting mayhem around here.

    I'm around now, if you need to chat!

    XXX

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  2. A turn around the yard is part of baby steps! Even if it was just a thought. Some days are harder than others. Hugs for missing your brother like you do.

    Susanne

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  3. On days like that, just making it through the day counts!

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  4. Sending love,
    and light (the not foggy kind).

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